juicy

Dreams of Death

I watch him sleeping But know it's not peaceful His body twitches in anticipation As his dreams settle in I am too scared to sleep He needs me there I don't want to miss him wake In case it will be his last A bead of sweat Falls down his face He clenches my hand tightly Death is winning this time My breath is short and shallow I wake up screaming in pain He is sitting there holding my hand Watching me, holding back his tears.

Dark Prince

A blanket of darkness surrounds me
I close my eyes to sleep
I can feel him standing there
Watching me breathing deep and low
Watching me restlessly sleep
He tries to protect me
The evil is already floating within
He can only watch as I suffer alone
He wants to hold me
But all he can do is just watch
He was taken from me
On that dark wet night
I pray he will come and get me
So I don't have to sleep alone
He was and always will be
My Dark Prince.

Valentine's Day

I keep telling people that I am not romantic, but for those who know me, know full well I write poetry and I love the works of all the Romantics and of course Shakespeare.  So deep down I suppose I am a romantic at heart.  But what better way to spend Valentine's Day but getting all hot and sweaty at a

Europe

gig.  Well they certainly got my heart racing.  I was in heaven.  After 22 years since "The Final Countdown" came out and graced us, they still know how to keep their fans smiling, screaming and singing.  And I don't mean by their gyrating hips (well only a little bit - GOD DAMN!)

If that wasn't enough, I got to work the next day with hardly any voice, as hoarse as can be, and at around 5pm 12 velvet look red roses arrived for me.  So to the person that sent them to me, I know who you are, you know who you are, I truly thank you.  They are truly beautiful and of course my favourite.

Bad Dreams

Why is it that when you have a bloody good weekend it is spoilt by the thought that you have to go to work again or by the fact someone is haunting you in your dreams.

I wouldn't mind if he was being nice to me, but all it is, is his face appearing out of nowhere and just staring at me, coldly.  And why is it that when you want to wake up from bad dreams you never can but you always wake up at a crucial point in a nice dream?

Dark Angel

You watch me suffer in great pain
But still you wont take me
Why is it that you take others?
I see you lead them away
How much more do I have to suffer?
I can not take the pain anymore
Dark angel I know you can hear me
End my pain and lead me from all this.

New Years Resolution

First I would like to wish you all a very Happy New Year, and may 2007 be a good one for you all!

I don't normally make New Years Resolutions as I never tend to keep them anyway.  But all I aim to do and keep is to stay happy and be more confident in myself.  What are your Resolutions for 2007?

Looking Back

Looking back at what I have achieved, gone through during the last year, doesn't look as if I did anything to the max if that makes sense.  I started the year out single but nothing new there that is just part of nature but I had high hopes of achieving something more for myself.  I knew it was going to be a tough one, blimey I was reaching 30 years of age.  I think I can honestly say I did gig out to the max with the lovely Pix and if we didn't it was only because there was not that many gigs to choose from that we personally like.  I had three holidays, two of which were to Spain, one was with my parents where believe it or not I entered an adult talent contest and I won - LOL.  Don't worry if you are laughing I am laughing myself.

May came and I was loosing one of my closest friends to Spain for good, She had finally had enough of England, at least I knew where I would be going on holidays.  It was hard taking her to the airport to say "see you later".  Then if that wasn't depressing enough my 30th finally arrived.  I was looking forward to it at first then it arrived and I was like Hell on Earth.  I did treat myself to a nice litte car though.  I thought it was about time, I mean I have two jobs so I might as well treat myself.  Next step I think is my own home, I know, I have to keep dreaming on that one!

I hit an all time low, why this time, another friend had told me that she is leaving England for good, to the other side of the World.  New Zealand, at least she said I can visit when I like, but I'm not sure about the flight, I'm not a good flyer as it is, I have to be pulled on to the plane to fly to Spain.

I started concetrating more on my writing (which was why I had gone quiet on here) and met this guy through work who had published his life story.  It was very emotional but he helped me to get to grips with my writing.  Thanks for that K.

Then something positive happened, I was asked to make a film, which I must say I was very nervous but I have had a ball doing so.  The film will be finished by the end of January and we will be doing a few screenings.  And to top it all I met my Monster, have fallen head over heels in love.  It couldn't have come at a better time.  He has asked me to move in with him but I still haven't given him the answer yet.  I think he knows what will happen, I just have to be ready in myself and with myself.

All I can say now is roll on 2007!

Cradle of Filth

WOW!  As previously mentioned, my other half was taking me to see Cradle of Filth at Astoria before they close the excellent venue down.  He was quite amazed to see the see of black make up and that was just from the guys.  Thank god it wasn't raining this time like when we went to see WASP but it was so cold and having to queue practically around the other side of Oxford Street was no fun.  The funny thing was the conversations that you could over hear.  Where do some of these people come from.  Well when we eventually got in there, I wasn't allowed to go anywhere near the front after what happened last time - lol.  Well when Mr Filth came on to the stage I was slightly shocked.  He is so small it is unbelievable but oh what a voice.  His voice certainly raised the roof, even when he just spoke it was just so husky, deep and very sexy.  There was certainly a lot of moshing going on but I was a good girl and kept my hands to myself - Damn!!!

Crimbo

Well it's only approximately 36 hours till Santa has been and gone.  When looking at the letter I sent him asking for snow, it certainly does look possible.  It is absolutely freezing and I feel like my eye lashes have just gone all stiff.  OK so I am getting all soppy and romantic but I am allowed to at this time of year.  What have you all asked Santa for?

Amazed

The words to Lonestar's hit Amazed keeps playing in my head, the words are so lovely I thought I would share them all with you.

Every time our eyes meet
This feeling inside me
Is almost more than I can take
Baby when you touch me
I can feel how much you love me
And it just blows me away
I've never been this close to anyone or anything
I can hear your thoughts
I can see your dreams

I don't know how you do what you do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I want to spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Baby, I'm amazed by you

The smell of your skin
The taste of your kiss
The way you whisper in the dark
Your hair all around me
Baby you surround me
You touch every place in my heart
Oh, it feels like the first time, every time
I want to spend the whole night in your eyes

Chorus

Solo

Every little thing that you do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I want to spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Baby, I'm amazed by you