juicy

I'm Just A Groupie...

.....but I don't sleep with the band members I just love the music.

It has started again!  By this I mean myself and the lovely Pix have been hitting the gigs again, slowly building up our nights out again.  I started it by going to see the Goo Goo Dolls and getting very close to the lovely Johnny Rzenik, and I must say his eyes can melt a thousand girls hearts in a second.  I followed this up the following night by seeing the fantastic Meatloaf (no laughing he is fantastic) at the Royal Albert Hall, I went with my mum and this was simply breath-taking.  I know, slightly soft so thought I would step the pace up a little bit, so me and Pix went to see Roadstar at the Mean Fiddler, and as always they gave a blinding show, unfortunately the headliners were somewhat not getting our approval so we walked out of the gig nice and early to walk straight into the members of Roadstar.  Now this was more like it, we got to meet the guys and yes like a right groupie that I am had my picture taken with 3 of the guys including Chris Rivers the drummer, (yes I have a thing for drummers).

Ok so that wasn't enought, and booked tickets to see W.A.S.P. at the London Astoria as a surprise for my other half.  Have to make the most of it as they will be closing the venue down next year which is a god damn shame.  W.A.S.P. was absolutely amazing and I have to admit I did get a bit of concert rage.  I shocked my other half as I yanked this girls ponytail who thought moshing was a good idea.  She soon stopped moshing after that little incident.  Only thing was where my better half was trying to protect me from getting hurt it looked like he was the one that actually yanked her hair.  We both couldn't stop laughing.

A few days later, I am waiting outside the Forum in Kentish Town, waiting for Pix and J, to go in and see Thunder.  I can't help it, Ben Matthews does something to me as poor Pix knows, everytime we go to see them, it's "Pix, I'm in love".  Even better they played my song again, and yes I screamed like a little girl and my eyes filled with tears.  The eye contact was non stop, it was a shame it had to end! 

Whats next on the concert/gig front, well my better half is taking me to see Cradle of Filth in December and no laughing now or jokes about they only have one song, the fantastic Europe are on tour again in February and funny enough it is on Valentine's Day.  It would be rude not to. 

The Journey

The whistle blew.  That was it, I couldn’t turn back now even if I wanted to.  The train jolted and then started onwards to its and my destination.  Edinburgh.  I have only lived in London a year and already it was home to me, now I have to make one of the worst journeys of my life, and do it alone.

The train seems to be going at a deadly pace, I know that it is just pulling out of the station but I need it to be in Edinburgh now.  My sister and her boyfriend will already be there.

I pressed my forehead against the cold window and as if by synchronisation a rain drop travels down the glass as a tear escapes from my left eye.  The sky was a dull grey and the rain was starting to fall faster, all I could feel was empty.  I closed my eyes but all I could see was his face staring back at me, smiling.  A hand touched me on my shoulder and I jumped.  It was only the ticket inspector, he apologised for making me jump.  He asked me if there was something wrong as he could tell I had been crying.  I told him I had to get back home to Edinburgh to say goodbye to my dad before he falls asleep forever.  He told me he was sorry, and reached into his pocket for a tissue so I could wipe my eyes.  I thanked him and he continued on his way checking tickets with the occasional look back over his shoulder at me.  It was only then that I noticed that I wasn’t alone in the carriage, there was a young mum and her son sitting opposite me.  They just smiled at me and she carried on reading to her son.

I continued to look out of the window and noticed I only had about another 30 minutes before I would be there.  I had to wipe my eyes and be brave, especially for my dad.  I know he would not want to see me upset, besides I needed to phone my mum to let her know I wasn’t far away.

I can feel the train slowing down, I have to compose myself but I feel paralysed for I know today is the last time I will ever see my dad.  It hurts to know he will never walk me down the isle or hold my children, his grandchildren.

I can see the station coming into view, the train slowed completely down.  I got up and walked to the door.  The train stopped, I stepped off the train and saw my sister standing there, her face stained with tears.  We held each other tight and then slowly walked towards the car, our hands entwined as one.  We inhaled the cold wintery wind and continued onwards.